Tea Party Tony, of course, chooses not to follow in the footsteps of the founders. He prefers to avoid all debate. Mr. Jefferson also observed, "When a man has cast a longing eye on office, a rottenness begins in his conduct." Tony's counting on the torries to put him in.
I suppose, if the founders had been like Tony Larson, the delegates to Philadelphia would not have constituted a very large group! They could have foregone the Declaration and relied on yard signs in empty lots to drive out the British. Hancock would have signed with invisible ink!
What would our history be if the founders were cut from Tony Larson cloth? If they possessed his political courage?
Patrick Henry might instead be remembered for, "Give me Liberty...but if that's too much to ask, how about a comfortable position from which to milk the public?"
Paul Revere's horse would have been riderless, and American patriots would have realized the horse's ass was hiding at home.
Nathan Hale's last words before being hanged by the British would have been, "I only regret that I didn't keep my mouth shut."
John Paul Jones would be famous for, "I haven't any intention to fight."
Paine would have written, ""These are the times that try men’s souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, wisely shrink from the challenge."
And school children everywhere would have learned, "Flee before you see the whites of their eyes!"
We would all be the children of a very different political tradition. But hell, we'd have a queen!
